Harry Goes to Bayonne
by S.Silver 360
Summary: Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, Luna, and Neville have moved to Bayonne, NJ. But what happens when they meet business entrepreneur Evan Jones? This is a crossover with Hannah Montana.
1. The Arrival

**The Harry Potter Crew Moves to Bayonne**

Disclaimer: I don't own any HP characters or the Coach USA companies.

_July 2, 2017. Elizabeth, NJ. Black Star Express president Evan Jones purchases Coach USA subsidiary Red & Tan In Hudson County bus lines #10 and #99S. This transfer of ownership will result in the formation of the Boulevard Bus Service Corporation(BBS), subsidiary of Black Star Transportation, Inc. Three weeks later, Harry Potter and his friends arrive at Newark-Liberty International Airport from London, England and are planning to move into two adjacent house on Avenue E across from Evan Jones and BBS vice-president Renee Johnson. Find out what will happen._

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**

"Hey Evan, get over here." called Renee. "The newcomers are here."

"What newcomers?" asked Evan. "I didn't hear about any newcomers1"

"I told you last night." said Renee.

Evan looked outside and saw a BBS-owned coach bus parked across the street from his house that. Six people came out the bus. A blond girl, two red-headed girls, two black-haired boys and a red-headed boy. The blond girl, a black-haired boy and a red-headed girl go into one house, while the remaining three went into the house on the right. Then Evan looked to Renee who was getting ready to leave the house.

"Where are you going?" asked Evan.

"I'm going to the new neighbors." Replied Renee with two pies in her hand as she reached to grab Evan's hand. "And you're coming with me."

"But why do I have to go?" complained Evan. "Don't we have to do stuff for our business."

"That's what we a supercomputer for." replied Renee.

Author's Note: The supercomputer in question, was built as a homemaker, but it also does things related to Black Star Express and BBS such as finances, employee surveillance, etc.


	2. The Visit

Disclaimer: I don't own any HP characters or any Hannah Montana characters or the Coach USA companies.

Renee and Evan were walking to the newcomers houses when they ran into Jackson Stewart. 

"Hey." greeted Evan.

"Hey." replied Jackson. "Are those pies for the newcomers?"

"Yeah." said Renee. "Is that why you have that cake?"

"Yup." said Jackson, who proceeded to knock on the door of 487 Avenue E.

Then, a red-headed woman opened the door to look at the trio.

"Hello," said Evan. "My name is Evan Jones, and I'm the president of Black Star Express; this is Renee Johnson and she is the vice-president of said and president of its subsidiary Boulevard Bus Service, the company that provided charter service you and group, and the two of us live together; and this is Jackson Stewart, supervisor for the Jersey City Branch of Rico's Restaurant, who lives with his dad, his sister and her best friends.".

"Hello," replied the giggling woman as two men came to the. "My name is Hermione Granger, and these two are Harry Potter and Ronald Weasley. Harry, Ron, these three are Evan, Renee and Jackson.

"Hello." greeted Harry and Ron in unison. 

"Hey!" said Jackson. "How did you get the scar on your forehead?"

"A dark wizard named Voldemort gave it to me when I was one." replied Harry. "He did it right after he killed my parents."

"Fortunately," said Ron. "Harry killed him sixteen years after that nasty incident."

"Wow!" replied Evan, Renee, and Jackson in unison. 

"Well," said Jackson. "I guess I'll just give this chocolate cake."

"And I give you one of these pies." said Renee.

"Why did give 'em just one?" asked Jackson.

"Because, Jackson," replied Evan. "The newcomers inhabit two houses. Each pie is for each house."

"Can I just take that cake back then?"asked Jackson as he took the cake back from Ron. "You three can eat at my house tonight. You too."

"Right." said a puzzled Renee. "We'll just go to the next house."

"Right." said Harry. "See you at seven."

Then Evan and Renee went to the next house at 489 Avenue E. Then Renee knocked on door. And out came what Evan perceived to be the most beautiful blonde woman he saw.

"Hello," said the blonde woman.

"Um...uh...uh...uh...Hello." said Evan who was breathing heavily. "Please help me Renee

"Okay." said Renee. "Hi, my name is Renee Johnson and I live across from you. This is Evan, and I think he likes you."

"Well, hello, Evan." said the blonde. "My name is Luna Lovegood. "Would you like to come inside?"

"Um, alright" replied Evan.

Evan and Renee proceeded to enter the house where they met a red-headed woman and a black-haired man.

"Ginny, Neville,"called Luna. "this is Evan and Renee."

"Hi." said Renee while Ginny, Neville, waved to Evan and vice versa.

"So anyway," said Renee. "we came to give you this pie to celebrate your arrival and we already gave one to Harry, Ron, and Hermione." 

"Also, we're going a party for the same reason we gave you that pie," announced Evan. "and we would like for you three to come." "I know you will." said Evan as he turned to Luna., who then giggled.

"Right, so we'll see you at seven?" said Renee as she walked toward Evan to take him outside.

"Bye!" said Evan as he made the "call me" sign.

"Evan seems to like you. Luna." said Ginny.

"I know." replied Luna.

"Well, do you like him back?" asked Ginny

"I think so." answered Luna.

Uh...I think I'm gonna unpack." said Neville.

Author's Note: Sorry about the lack of action, but you've read and have learned of relationship that might might start.


	3. Prelude to the Suprise

_Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or Hannah Montana._

* * *

"Hey, dad."called Jackson. "Can you make me another cake?"

"Sweet nibblets son, did you eat the one I made already made for you?" asked Robby Ray.

"No, I have it right here." replied Jackson. "It turns out the newcomers moved into two separate houses."

"It's probably a marriage problem." assumed Robby Ray. "Though I've never seen a divorced couple so close to each other."

"There were six, dad." explained Jackson. "And neither of them are in a relationship."

"Oh,"said Robby Ray. "I start on that cake for you, son"

"Thanks you." said Jackson

_Meanwhile at 488 Avenue E..._

"Say it! Say it! Say you love Luna!? yelled Renee as she rode Evan while he was chained to her bed.

"I don't have to! I'm not your b-" refused Evan as she gave a powerful punch to his stomach.

"Well, come on! Say it!" yelled Renee. When he didn't answer her response was, "Well, if you tell me that you like Luna before either of us are released you're never leaving this bed. Now say it!" Then she delivered another blow to Evan's stomach.

"Fine!" said a surrendered Evan. "I love her."

"Now say it again." said Renee as she proceeded to gave him a handjob. "Say it so she can hear you."

"I love Luna!" yelled Evan. "Are you happy?"

"Not quite." said Renee as commence to ride Evan. After a few seconds, both Evan and Renee reached their equilibrium.

"Okay." said Evan. "Since you're done abusing me both literally and sexually, I will be leaving for a few hours."

"Fine." said Renee. "Don't do anything I'll make you regret."

But Evan had slammed the door to the house as Renee had finished her sentence."

_Four hours later..._

"Jackson!" yelled Robby Ray. "I made that second cake for you."

"Thanks, Pop." said Jackson as Miley entered the kitchen.

"Let me guess." said Miley. "You ate the first one didn't cha, didn't cha?" She then lifted cover and saw the cake was still whole.

"Oh." said a surprised Miley. "So, why is Dad baking another cake?"

"Evan said the newcomers lived in two different houses." replied Jackson.

"Evan also said the he'd make his basement more interesting and it was snowing there." said Miley as Lilly and Oliver entered the scene.

"Well, that was more interesting." said Oliver.

"So, Mr. Stewart," said Lilly. "I see you're making cake."

"Ya think?" said Miley.

"So, what's the occasion?" asked Lilly.

"Well, we have some newcomers today." replied Robby Ray.

"Then, why are there two cake." asked Oliver.

"As Jackson, has informed me, the neighbor moved into two adjacent houses."

"It's probably a marriage problem," assumed Roxy. "but, why do they right next to each other."

"There were six, Roxy," explained Jackson. "and neither of them are in a relationship."

"Assuming there are some females," said Oliver. "I might get someone to ride the Ollie Trolley."

Lilly then pulled on Oliver's shirt. "Oliver, if you so much as even flirt with any girl we meet, then I swear to God I will make your first time miserable. Now let's go"

Five blocks south, the Hannah Montana crew arrived at 489 Avenue E, where Luna, Neville, and Ginny live. Neville Longbottom had then opened the door before anyone could knock on it.

"Oh, uh...hello." greeted a shy Neville. "Mmmm-uhhh...would you like in?"

"Kinda shy there, buddy," said Robby Ray. "But, sure." The group then entered the house and then encountered Ginny upon entrance into the living room.

"Hello, my name is Ginny Weasley and this man here is Neville Longbottom. He's a little shy." The Hannah Montana crew then introduced themselves to Ginny and Neville.

"Another person lives here." continued Ginny "She's in her room. I'll take you there right now if you like."

They then proceeded to follow Ginny and Neville to Luna's room.

"Hey." said Jackson to Oliver. "A girl for each of us." Jackson and Oliver then gave each a five. Following was Lilly pinching Jackson's arm.

"Don't think what I would do to Oliver I won't do to you, Jackson." warned Lilly.

Neville opened the door to Luna's room and what they saw shocked them so.

**Author's Note: **Nice, cliffhanger, huh? Well, if you've read this far, I'll tell you that the next chapter is mostly a flashback.


	4. The Flashback

_**Disclaimer: **I do not own HP of HM. I do own Evan and Renee._

* * *

Neville opened the door to Luna's room and what they saw shocked them so.

It was Evan and Luna on the bed with Luna on top.

"Now, what's going on here?" asked Oliver.

"Oh, I don't know." answered Miley sarcastically. "Maybe Evan's doing it with a blonde girl on _her_ bed!"

"Luna, why?" cried Ginny as she left the room in tears

"Ginny!" called Neville as he and Roxy went after her.

"Now, how did this start anyway?" asked Robby Ray.

"Well..." began Evan.

_Joint Flashback from Evan and Luna._

"_Say it! Say it! Say you love Luna!? yelled Renee as she rode Evan while he was chained to her bed._

"_I don't have to! I'm not your b-" refused Evan as she gave a powerful punch to his stomach._

"_Well, come on! Say it!" yelled Renee. When he didn't answer her response was, "Well, if you tell me that you like Luna before either of us are released you're never leaving this bed. Now say it!" Then she delivered another blow to Evan's stomach._

"_Fine!" said a surrendered Evan. "I love her."_

"_Now say it again." said Renee as she proceeded to gave him a handjob. "Say it so she can hear you."_

"_I love Luna!" yelled Evan. "Are you happy?"_

"_Not quite." said Renee as commence to ride Evan. After a few seconds, both Evan and Renee reached their equilibrium._

"_Okay." said Evan. "Since you're done abusing me both literally and sexually, I will be leaving for a few hours."_

"_Fine." said Renee. "Don't do anything I'll make you regret."_

_But Evan had slammed the door to the house as Renee had finished her sentence. He then ran to 489 Avenue E where Luna was and ran to her room. He began to tell her what had happened over at 488 Avenue E._

"_It's a little messed up." said Luna as she ran her index finger on Evan's head in circles "Does this happen to you often?"  
_

"_Only, when she wants me to admit something." replied Evan._

"_To tell you the truth," began Luna. "I like you too."_

"_So, do you want to go somewhere?" asked Evan._

"_Where were you thinking of going?" asked Luna._

"_Well, I was thinking we could go a restaurant in Jersey City where one of my friends works." replied Evan._

"_Oh, really?" wondered Luna. "What's it called?"_

"_It's called Rico's." answered Evan._

_Evan and Luna then left the house to go the Rico's restaurant at Newport Mall._

_Ten minutes later, Evan and Luna had arrived at Newport Mall by use of Luna's broomstick._

"_Okay," said Evan. "I don't think I ever want to use a broomstick to travel again. I like living, man!"_

_Luna starting giggling as he said this. "Aren't you going to lead me to the restaurant?" she asked._

"_It's right here," replied Evan. After eating there for a hour talking about themselves, friends, et cetera, the newly-formed couple began making their way back home._

"_Let's take the Light Rail." suggested Evan out of fear of flying on a broomstick._

_When they reached home, Evan and Luna decided to go to Luna's room and sat on her bed._

"_Again, I would like to thank you for that nice lunch." said Luna. "I do hope we could try it again."_

"_You're welcome." replied Evan as he looked toward a scrapbook next to Luna's book. "What's this?"_

"_It's a book I'm working on. replied Luna. "It belongs to a field that deals with sex. I think called 'pornology.'"_

"_Pornography." corrected Evan. "I never thought there would be porn that I would actually have to read. Don't you think it's a little strange that you have to imagine what the characters in the literary porn would look like?_

"_Evan, almost everyone I know thinks I'm strange." said a slightly saddened Luna._

"_Oh, sorry." apologized Evan._

"_However," continued Luna. "if you prefer pornography where real people have sex with other, then perhaps I can show you."_

_She then put on "Slow Motion" and started to kiss Evan on the lips. Her tongue tried to dig its way into Evan's lips. They then fell on the bed with Luna on top._

"_Is that good enough for you?" asked Luna._

"_More than good." replied Evan as Luna began strip dancing._

_End of Flashback._

"And then we went on from there." finished Luna.

"We did it exactly as Miley and Jackson did it a week ago." said Evan.

"Evan, are you alright?" asked Miley as though he was crazy.

Evan then pulled out a flat camera from his pants pocket and played the sexual incident that Miley was trying to deny."

_Miley and Jackson's sexual encounter._

"_Oh...oh...ohhh...oh Jackson, you're such a great fucker." moaned Miley._

"_I should have went after you years ago." replied Jackson._

"_Why didn't you." asked Miley._

"_I guess I was jealous of you." answered Jackson_

"_Cuz' I was Hannah Montana?" asked Miley as she ran her fingers up Jackson's left cheek_

"_Well, yeah." said Jackson as he leaned to kiss her. However, before he could, something happened._

"_Oh, great. The condom broke." said Jackson._

"_Go get one of those flavored condoms." ordered Miley. "They taste so good."_

Evan then stopped the video as Lilly left the room in tears.

"Lilly!" called Oliver as he followed her out the room.

"Jackson Rod Stewart, what were you thinking, if you were?" asked Robby Ray.

"I was lonely and heartbroken." answered Jackson. "She was there for me."

"Well, Miley Ray Stewart." called Robby Ray. "What's your excuse?"

"Coincidentally, the same thing." replied Miley.

"Now, I want to know exactly how that started." said Robby Ray.

"Daddy, I think that's another flashback for another fanfiction story." replied Miley.

"Fine!" said a defeated Robby Ray. "But we will talk about this eventually. Now let's go downstairs and help Lilly and Ginny feel better." Then Robby Ray, Jackson, Miley, Evan, and Luna all went downstairs to the living room.

**A/N: **I know, I know. It's messed up. The next chapter should the last. I will tell you this. There will be one more sexual encounter. I hope you enjoyed so far.


	5. Dinner and Confessions

_**Disclaimer:**__I don't own Harry Potter or Hannah Montana._

* * *

**A/N: **Well, this my last chapter. As mentioned in the previous chapter, there will be one more sexual encounter. Enjoy.

"Thanks, Neville." said Ginny as tears were still rolling down her face.

"So, when are you going to tell her?" asked Neville.

"I don''t know when exactly." replied Ginny. "I do know it'll be tonight."

"Ginny, I'll be here for you when you tell her." said Neville.

"Thank you, Neville." said Ginny as she hugged him.

Meanwhile, in living room...

"How could she?" said a angry Lilly.

"Apparently, they were both dumped." replied Oliver "Each saw it happen to the other. They were right there for each other when it happened."

"So, what!" said Lilly. "She slept with her own brother. Her own brother! She could've came to me! Or even you, but Jackson? It's illegal."

"Well, actually," said Roxy. "Since, our planet is now ruled by aliens, incest is legal. Along with child pornography and bestiality."

"Okay, that's just sick." said a disgusted Oliver as Lilly started crying again. "Come on Lils, I'm sure it was just a one-night stand."

'Thanks guys." said Lilly as Oliver and Roxy hugged her. "Now let's go home" suggested Roxy. "It's almost time for dinner and I'm getting hungry."

Half an hour later, everyone from 487-489 Avenue E, were at the Robby Ray's house. The first few minutes of dinner was quiet until Evan breaks the silence on Luna's whim.

"Do I have to do it now?" asked Evan. Luna then gave him a look saying he had no choice.

"Uh...hello." said a nervous Evan. "First, I would like to apologize for what happened in Luna's room, especially to Ginny and Lilly. Next, I would like two welcome our neighbors and I hope you six adjust well."

"Yeah, they'll need it living across from him." whispered Miley to Lilly.

"What did he do to my sister?" as Ron furiously to Neville.

"He slept with Luna." replied Neville.

"And that hurts her, how?" asked Hermione.

"You'll find out." replied Neville.

"Since you're done, Evan," began Ginny. "I should explain why he was apologizing to me. Luna, the reason I left the room in tears was because...I love you. Not as a best friend, but a lover. And when I saw you and Evan doing it on the bed, it broke my heart."

"Ginny, If it make really feel better, Evan and I aren't dating." said Luna. "We were caught up in the moment."

"What about the fact that you said that you liked him?" asked Jackson.

"That's it." answered Luna. "I like him. We were never in a relationship."

"Lilly, do you have something to tell me?" asked Miley.

"I tell you, when I'm ready." replied Lilly.

"Hey, I have an idea." said Robby Ray. "How about we forget about this and enjoy a nice dinner."

Everyone was murmuring about Robby Ray's sentence.

"He said eat!" yelled Roxy as all began eating in fear of her.

"So, Harry." called Evan. "It has come my attention that you are wealthy."

"Yes." replied Harry. "What are you getting at?"

"Well, I was thinking." said Evan. "Maybe some time later, we could work out a business deal."

"Evan!" called Renee.

"What?" responded Evan.

"No business deals!" said Lilly, Miley, Renee, and Robby Ray in unison.

"Fine!" said a defeated Evan.

"Um, this is good." complimented Ginny.

"Almost as good as--" But before she could finished her sentence, Hermione was interrupted by a door being opened by a tall slim figure who she immediately identified. "Severus!"

"What do you mean 'Almost as good as Severus?'" asked Ron furiously.

"No, Ron, Snape's here." said Hermione.

"What are you doing here?" asked Ron.

"If you must know Weasley I have come to profess my love to Miss Granger" replied Snape.

"Severus, there are people here." said Hermione.

"No matter." said Snape. "They can witness what I will say next." He then walked to Hermione and knelt before her and took out a ring. "Hermione Jane Granger, will you marry me?"

Before answering, Hermione looked at Ron and wondered whether life would be better with Ron. She had then made her decision.

"Yes." replied an elated Hermione. "Yes, Severus I will."

She then jumped on top of Severus Snape and made out with him on the kitchen.

"Please, take it somewhere else." pleaded a disgusted Robby Ray.

"Oh God, make it stop." screamed Neville. Everyone then turned their eyes toward as Neville.

"Fine." said the Narrator(Yours truly). "Just, a few more lines."

"Bloody hell." murmured Neville.

"I think we should try this another time." said Robby Ray.

"Ditto." agreed Renee as everyone except Robby Ray, Jackson, Miley, and Roxy left the living room.

"Well, that was a disaster." said Jackson.

"Yeah, it was." agreed Miley.

"At least the next one will be better." said Robby Ray.

"At least the food was good." said Roxy who left to her and Robby Ray's room.

"Now, you kids want to tell me about incest that Evan recorded." asked Robby Ray.

"Like Evan said," said Jackson. "it's another flashback for another fanfic."

"I am so gonna get Evan tomorrow. Good night, Jackson." said Miley as she kissed Jackson on his forehead. "Good night, daddy."

"Good night, bud." said Robby Ray.

"Man, this is one messed up fanfic." said Robby Ray to himself. "I wonder what Oliver and Lilly are doing right now. I probably don't wanna know."

Meanwhile, in Oliver's room, Lilly had chained Oliver to his bed with her on top of him while the _song For the Love of You _was playing

"I told you, Oliver. I told you!" said Lilly. "You do not...(moan)...flirt...(moan)...with...(moan)...other...(moan)...girls."

"Why are you doing this." asked Oliver. "I didn't even flirt with anybody."

"Liar!" accused Lilly as she smacked him in his face. "I saw you flirting with that girl Hermione before that man came in and proposed to her."

"But-" started Oliver as Lilly interrupted by placed two fingers on his lips.

"Just because it wasn't written doesn't mean it didn't happen." said Lilly. "Do you wanna know something, not like you have a choice. That reason I cried when Evan showed that video was because." Lilly then paused for moment. "I like Miley."

"If you like Miley, then why are you raping me?" asked Oliver.

"Well, one, because I told you not to flirt with anyone and you did." said Lilly as she start to massage his stick. "And, two, you're my best friend. You can't tell me I can't fuck my best friend."

"Well, yeah, but you're making it hurt, literally." said Oliver.

"Well, you deserved it." said Lilly. "I told you not to flirt with anybody."

"Well," started Oliver as Lilly kissed him on his lips. "I like Miley, too,."

Lilly then smacked Oliver's face and began to walk out of the room.

"Lilly." called Oliver.

"Yes." responded Lilly.

"Can you take off the chains?" he asked.

"Oh, I'm not done with you." said Lilly as she gave him a look telling him she was very serious.. "Now, I have some unfinished business." Then she walk to Jackson's room and went inside.

"So, you want to take Ginny out on a date." said Lilly.

"What, no, I wasn't asking her on a date." lied Jackson.

"Even after you saw how hurt she was, you still wanted to ask on a date." said Lilly as she began to chain Jackson to his bed.

"So, how come you never ask me on a date?" asked Lilly.

"You're my sister's best friend." replied a frightened Jackson. "I couldn't do that to her."

"Yeah, you won't fuck me, but you'll fuck your own sister!" screamed Lilly as tears began to to roll down her eyes. "Well, you're gonna know what it's like to be with me."

"I'm sorry, Lilly! Please don't rape me!. I didn't mean to hurt you! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Nooooo!" screamed Jackson in horror as Lilly began to rape Jackson.

"God, that chick's crazy." whispered Oliver to himself.

"I heard that Oliver." said Lilly.

* * *

**A/N: **This is it. The end of the story. A few things I would like to clarify. I'm not a homo, I'm not crazy, and I'm not perverted, nor am I prejudice toward those who are. I do agree that this is a very messed up story, but I'm like it, and I hope you did. Reviews are accpeted. 


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